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All This Wandering Has Led Me to this Place - LiveJournal.com

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  • 03/15/10--02:30: Stunning Dean Vid-rec
  • I've just watched this vid - literally held my breath the entire length of it because of this huge lump growing in my throat - visually stunning fanvid of Dean Winchester. The lighting, colouring, motion and overall composition just makes your heart ache. The Sammy smiles for Dean are just beautiful in selection and presentation.

    Go watch it - by the talented [info]proofpudding 

    "Don't be hopeful, Dean. You're not delivered. It's only the wind."
    casey, 'sin city'

                    summary: You know, war, it has no heart.
                    music: no one would riot for less. bright eyes.
                    size/format/length: 73MB, wmv, 5:05
                    for [info]rivkat


     

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    I knew NOTHING about this episode before it aired - in the space of 43 minutes show made me do this:

    - Gasp in shock/horror
    - Go WTF?
    - Have tears of absolute adoring joy
    - Laugh out loud at Angels
    - Laugh for Sam
    - Laugh for Dean
    - Cry for Dean
    - Cry for Sam
    - Hate the writers
    - Love the writers
    - Hate the writers *again*
    - Love some more characters
    - Laugh out loud at some more characters
    - Cry for Sam AND Dean
    - Then cry for Castiel
    - And finally cue finishing with overwhelming heartache for both boys and Castiel

    All that in 43 minutes. I suspect the writers may be taking something. I loved this episode but I need to go have a Bex and lie down. I feel wrung out.

    Back later ....

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    I've watched and rewatched and then watched again....

    and there's no avoiding it, I just need to talk about this episode. [info]ash48 posted a question that was posted in her initial reaction post about what it was about this episode that caused such a massive and wildly polarised response. I found my own experience of this episode to be something akin to a stomach lurching roller coaster of moods and feelings - from an exhilarating sense of joy and warmth to the low of feeling really quite ill from the angst.

    It truly felt like an exercise in creating an experience of absolute conflict of emotions for the fans. I don't know much about Dabb and Loflin but they seemed to pick from both ends of the spectrum when it came to showing scenes the fans would love/swoon over and scenes that would cause loud screaming at the tv screen and intensely vitriolic reactions.

    On balance the episode was much more heavily weighted towards the angsty side of things - a fatalists delight - the optimists left looking for the vicodin.

    I'm curious to know if peoples' reactions to this episode are heavily influenced by their individual general natures in real life. Are you a generally happy-go-lucky person who doesn't get stressed or depressed often? If so was your reaction all doom and gloom or was it still hopeful? If you were entirely pissed off with what the writers did in this episode and find youself thinking that show is NEVER going to fix these boys to ever be a fraction of what they once were - are you generally a glass half empty kind of temperament? As an aside I'm not the kind of person who confuses realism with pessimism. I'm generally very realistic about possible outcomes which has been misconstrued in the past as pessimism but I prefer to call it Realistic Idealism :)

    That was just a fairly tangental musing I had about episode. What follows may be construed as the completely idealistic notions of a person with their head in the clouds but I'm one of the happy-go-lucky types.

    First of all Sam's memories. I can totally understand where Dean's coming from here. He has every right to be pissed about those memories being part of Sam's "Greatest Hits" - but there's "pissed" and then there's real and abject hurt/disappointment. I'm pretty sure Dean knows that Sam is unable to help what he longed for as a kid. He was a teenage kid and that includes all the self-absorbed, grass is always greener, me first emo crap that goes along with that. That scene reliving the night he left for Stanford was one of those writer selections of breaking the boys to the point that TV screens get yelled at. Because we know Dean is not that unreasonable. Case in point - conversation at the end of Fallen Idols. And I'm pretty sure that had the "road" they followed taken them longer then there would have definitely been some happy Sam POV Sam and Dean memories. Someone should write those up - stat.

    Secondly I wanted to look at the good things in this episode purely from a fan seeing what she likes perspective:
    1) First memory - the fireworks scene - Dean's emotions so clear in his expressions it was an achingly beautiful moment and it was just so  far removed from where Dean has been recently that it made it all the more visceral. Nice one Jensen - this was some great work.

    2) Castiel getting a little snarky with the boys when he was in the TV set. Misha delivered that line with just the right amount cutting sharpness - I loved it because it's a great example of Castiel's humanisation.

    3) Dean's memory of his Mom. This was one of those scenes that made me feel a little unsure of what I was feeling - I loved Dean's memory of his room, his toys, his Mom, how much he loves her and how much she clearly loves him. But I ached for his early onset of responsibility - trying to comfort his Mom about Dad - and Sam just summed it up and brought it right home to Dean. This one was a positive and a negative for me.

    4) Sam had a dog! I've always thought he would have had one at some stage no matter how impossible it seemed given their lives. Again this was bittersweet because this memory basically meant Dean's life was hell for two weeks. I'm not defending Sam for his choice - but a teenage kid who'd had it up to there with their so far from normal lives - every kid rebels at some point.

    5) Dr Badass is IN!!!! Oh Ash - never stop your mad skills and your exotic beer chugging habits. Loved EVERYTHING about this scene - although the dialogue with Pam did raise my suspicions a little I was just happy that she was at peace. But the BEST thing about this whole scene? Show confirmed it - out loud - SOULMATES. Can't share less you've found your soulmate and there's Sam and Dean. Sharing their slice of heaven together. Of course we all knew this already but still - it's now confirmed CANON.

    Okay those were the FIVE main happy making parts of the episode for me. Of course with the title being the DARK side of the moon it was always going to finish Dark. There's still six episodes to go - it would be premature of #16 to end on an uplifting, boys are getting fixed note.
    But as usual the Supernatural version of dark is always with capital letters.

    1) Knowing that Dean even as a four year old was trying hard to fix his family.
    2) Knowing that Dean later on went through two weeks of hell thinking Sammy was dead.
    3) Dean clearly upset by the fact that Sam's good memories of family never seem to include him.
    4) Zachariah being a gross, lecherous dick of an Angel who manipulates the memory of Mary to further torture Dean.
    5) Joshua informing the boys that God is finished with it all and the repercussions of this - Dean writing God off as another dead-beat Dad (and when the hell has he ever referred to John like that!?! I was alarmed), Castiel's subsequent desolation and clear sense of abandonment and finally Dean throwing the amulet. That pissed me off the most I think. The amulet thing because it certainly punches a hole in my above theory that deep down Dean is reasonable enough to realise the child/teenage Sam is a vastly different Sam to the one that is with him now. But then as soon as episode closed with Sam still in the room I was mildly placated because I'm more than 90% sure Sam has picked that amulet up. It still has a place in the story and I think we will be seeing it glow before the final moment of the Season 5 finale.

    Really Sam got off lightly in this episode (apart from the guilt tripping by Dean and Joshua) and on a shallow note - that brown button up he was wearing at the end? Absolutely Sam's colour. Mmmm.

    So I ended up with five scenes on both sides of the spectrum for me. It didn't leave me with a sense of despair - that snippet at the end of Sam still being in the room with the amulet, the insight into the memories and stories from the boys childhoods, the fact that God is on Earth, that Ash and Pamela are at peace were all feel-good moments for me. I have my suspicions (as do most from the reactions I've read) about how orchestrated the whole incident was by powers invested in Dean saying yes to Michael (especially given Sam's presence in Heaven) and that's just triggered another positive for me - Dean's assertion that Sam totally belongs there because was he did was borne out of his intentions to do good - I'll just ignore that old adage Sam brought up as completely irrelevant.

    I can see where this episode would elicit reactions of intense dislike and impassioned offense. I can also see very clearly the good in this episode and it is heartwarming moments. A lesson in extremes and I'm placing this one in my top 5 of the season so far. Call me a sucker for nostalgic reminiscence but Dylan's Knockin' On Heaven's Door will never be the same for me ever again.

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  • 04/10/10--09:43: Meme like ways...
  • SIX NAMES YOU GO BY:
    1. Simone
    2. redteekal
    3. Simy
    4. Honey
    5. Gremlin (historically)
    6. Miss

    THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
    1. Puma black t shirt
    2. Everlast grey zip up hoodie
    3. Livestrong yellow rubber bracelet

    THREE THINGS YOU WANT VERY BADLY AT THE MOMENT
    1. LJ to work so I can read my flist
    2. My bed
    3. All the housework to be done (without me doing it)

    THREE PEOPLE WHO YOU HOPE WILL DO THE MEME
    1. Castiel
    2. Clark Kent
    3. Eric Northman

    THREE THINGS YOU DID LAST NIGHT
    1. Ran 7 times at an agility trial
    2. Avoided twitter and my flist
    3. Read

    TWO PEOPLE YOU LAST TALKED TO ON THE PHONE:
    1. Mr Redteekal
    2. My mother

    THREE THINGS YOU ARE GOING TO DO TOMORROW:
    1. Go to lunch at a riverfront restaurant
    2. Washing
    3. Train the doggies

    THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE DRINKS:
    1. Sprite Zero with a dash of lime cordial
    2. Dome Choc O Block Espresski
    3. Iced Tea

    THREE Things THAT Made YOU SMILE TODAY:
    1. Watching Savvy play with another puppy round her age.
    2. Running clear at an agility trial
    3. Castiel telling Sam he drunk a liquor store

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  • 04/11/10--09:09: Movie rec

  • This is probably an old movie by now for most of you but we went and caught a screening of Kick Ass tonight. It was a private screening Mr Redteekal and myself had the whole theatre to ourselves. First time in ever in the 13 odd years we've been seeing movies together!

    Anyway I wanted to recommend this film to my flist. That kind of surprises me because to be honest I was pretty much prepared for a mediocre entertaining film. This film really grabbed me and I think it was because it took a fairly different slant on the whole superhero theme by throwing in some fairly gritty realism that goes with the whole concept of the average joe trying to be a superhero - the ones without any super powers who still try to do good.

    The story was well told (nothing new - it definitely had echoes of Luc Besson's The Professional or Leon) and the characters interesting. Dave - the main protagonist was very much a typical teenage boy who rapidly comes to grips with the harshness of a reality where an ordinary person tries to do good, fight evil, save the day.

    It didn't pull any punches and the violence at times was reminiscent of some Tarantino type scenes so probably not for the faint of heart when it comes to the blood and the beatings. It had some very funny moments too - the main antagonist played evil well, again reminding me of Gary Oldman's character from Leon or any of the more well known cinema Mafioso bad guys.

    Performances were good (especially from the girl who played Hit Girl), fights scenes very well choreographed and the soundtrack did indeed Kick Ass. It was subverting the conventions of the superhero genre enough for me to be concerned about whether the ending would be happy.

    All in all a thoroughly unexpectedly entertaining film and well worth a look.

    It also meant we caught the trailers for the movie of Tomorrow When the War Began (one of my favourite novels by John Marsden) an Australian production that looks good, The Losers (goddamn Papa Winchester looks so very fine in that one - very appealing), The Book of Eli with Denzel Washington and a trailer for Hot Tub Time Machine which looks hilarious - will it be as funny as The Hangover though?

    All four look to be worth shelling out a ticket price for and that's rather unusual these days with my cinema going experience.

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  • 04/17/10--10:35: SN 5.18
  • You know that turn of phrase involving a heart and it being filled to bursting? I'm thinking it's a valid medical condition. Caused by the 100th episode of Supernatural. I've avoided my flist for the last 36 hours due to not being able to watch and I'm dying to click back and revel in fandom's reactions. But before I do I need to articulate my instant reaction having just finished watching it in the last 5 minutes.

    Once again I felt like I'd been strapped onto the rollercoaster - the one called SamnDean's Emotional Onslaught - such highs and lows all in one forty three minute episode that if you suffered from any kind of mood swing motion sickness you'd be reaching for the Dramamine.
    Scene by scene it wrung out all kinds of feelings from me as a viewer (who is clearly far too invested in this story to find any kind of emotional detachment that would make everything hurt less). My rollercoaster ride was as follows:

    Pissed offness

    Heart ache (Damn you Dean Winchester!)

    Proud of Sammy (he brought help!)

    Constant amusement at Castiel's bitchface which seems to permanently directed at Dean this entire episode (that comment about getting laid from Dean was pertinent - I must muse on that a while)

    Then smug pride in Castiel as he takes down two angels

    Sneaking fondness for Adam (cos he's so much like Dean it's not funny)

    Outright laughter at Cas and Dean bitching at each other.

    Quickly descending in Quadruple Level Heartache in the panic room. My inner monologue was all 'Dean you are SUCH a bastard (but I totally understand why you feel this way goddammit) and I don't believe a word of what you're saying and neither do you.' Attached to this was an intense desire to hug Sam because at this point not even a kicked puppy could look more in need of a hug.

    Dean you SNEAKY BASTARD! and then HO SHIT is Cas gonna be pissed when he gets back.

    Followed by a little glee (subdued and kinda guilty) in Cas smacking Dean around.

    Grrrrrrr Zachariah (yet I still find myself reveling in his style of evil - there's something macabrely facinating about him)

    Panic Room - Heart starting to fill with gooey warmth - Grinning from ear to ear at the TV and Sam. SAMMMMMMYY!! "Because....you're still my big brother." Awwww *pets Sam*

    Nail biting ensues - with Dean's line "He's tough for a little nerdy dude with wings" from TSRTS in my head I hope for the best.

    The Beautiful Room complete with Dean, Adam and Zach - I'm filled with intense unease about the whole situation tinged with a small dash of hopefully not in vain hope that Dean has a plan, at this point the house could have caught on fire and I still would have been glued to the sofa.

    I need to just take a minute here to mention what I thought was just a superb piece of work from Jensen in this scene. I truly think Dean was going to go through with it (I have always thought he will if it came down to saying yes or watching his brother die) but his face as Zach started summon Michael as his eyes fell on Sam was just riveting. At 36.57 exactly you see the entire thought that crosses his mind as his face changes from abject desperation to the most subtle look of realisation. Then at 37.04 that ghost of a smile and the understated yet irrevocably Deanish, wink.  That there was some master acting by Mr Ackles and I was duly impressed.

    Glee! (Dean ganked Zach - poetic really - not sure he was really ganked though cos he didn't do the usual Angel killed glowing thing)

    Final Impala Scene - Okay my heart obviously didn't literally burst what with all the brotherly LOVE that was going on here but it was feeling pretty damn happy by this point. UPLIFTING - there's a word I don't think I've ever used in a description of a scene for this show but there you have it. I felt UPLIFTED. It deserves capitalisation because it was just that much. Sam has faith and always will (I truly don't think he EVER lost his faith in Dean) and Dean's finally seen that his little brother's faith means something.

    What a way to finish your 100th episode. Give the fans a completely SamnDean story centric episode - it was, ultimately, all about their relationship, where it is, where it has been and where it is now going complete with all the scuffed and torn bits, some fixed bits and some parts that are on their way to healing.

    Two words in summary: Cathartic and Uplifting. And now I can sleep :)





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    Ecclectic post is ecclectic. Contained herewithin are some pics, a song, and a real life ramble of sorts

    First the fandom-related stuff namely Supernaturally related - these pics from the recent Rome convention via [info]elsiecat  made me smile today:



    Jensen's face and Misha's faux smile for cameras - priceless. Jensen's all "Do y'all see what I have to put up with?...D'ya see??"

    Then of course there's Jared.



    Floppy, long hiatus hair, hiatus stubble and that smile that makes me break out in my own scrunchy nose type grin.

    I'm so looking forward to the last four episodes of this season - it's going to be so hard to narrow down my top five Season 5 episodes only because of the fabulous reason that the quality of the episodes has been just that great. Dark Side of the Moon, Point of No Return, Changing Channels, The End, The Song Remains the Same, My Bloody Valentine, The Real Ghostbusters, Sam Interrupted .... the list goes on - I have a feeling if I exclude any of those from my top five it will be for rather petty and somewhat lame reasons!

    I mentioned a song - well it has to be two because I can't decide which one I like better right now (and they're both pretty much on repeat times forever) - this one by OneRepublic - Say (All I Need) from Dreaming Out Loud
    http://www.megaupload.com/?d=MEO1QTBX

    or this one by OneRepublic - Made For You from Waking Up (and if this isn't a Sam n Dean song for 5.18 I don't know what it is, check the lyrics)
    http://www.megaupload.com/?d=FNWIY9K3

    Lyrics for Made For You
    I was writing
    Thinking with my long hand
    Put pen to paper
    Everything was sinking
    Then you start to wonder
    How you gonna handle me?
    When I'm under
    Swimming in the dark sea

    Everybody wants you to make it
    Its all yours
    Everybody wants to take it
    Its all yours
    Everybody wants you to make it
    Its all yours
    Everybody wants to T-t-t-take it

    Can you feel all the love
    Can you feel all the love?
    Can you feel all the love
    Can you feel all the love?
    Like it was made for you
    Like it was made for you...

    Tell me something
    Something that can move me
    Dont tell me lies
    Or I swear you're gonna lose me
    Guilty? like an ocean
    Jealous of the fish it feeds
    Your devotion
    Swimming inside of me

    So on the real life front I have my new car, it's very pretty and it's a blue Clark Kent would approve of and if I'm honest about it all it's basically just luxury accomodation for dogs on wheels. Seriously. I've been driving it everywhere because I think I'm in love with it. It's big and blue and has blue tooth and it goes fast - maybe I should call it Clark? Here's a couple of pics of it - since then it's been upgraded with internal crating fitted for the dogs. Air con unit still to be fitted. I'll post some pics of the dogs in there when I'm at next weekend's trials.





    And this is who it is for:

    Miss Spryte! This picture taken last Saturday by her breeder at the State Agility Trials in which Spryte did some very good stuff winning
    the morning qualifying heat and finishing in 3rd in the finals. A good rehearsal for our Nationals being held here in Perth
    the weekend after next.  Well the new blue Clark is for her and her daughter Savvy and the mere male Cypher. They all approve of their new transport vehicle.

    I wanted to posted a couple of pictures of another dog I handle - I don't own this boy but he certainly gets a lot of comments
    around the grounds as he is really one of a kind in terms of his looks. This is Axl - he is a Koolie of around four years of age
    and he is obsessed with toys of any variety. He's also a lot of fun to run in agility and his owner is a good friend who lets me
    play with him in agility. Koolies originated in Germany and are said to have derived from a number of different breeds including
    the Australian Shepherd and the Kelpie and the Border Collie.


    Doing the seesaw here (or teeter totter in American ;-)...)



    Coming out the tunnel with my probably uneccessary hand signal there.

    In conclusion I love playing agility and it's nothing but for the next month - on the weekends at least in between that time I actually
    have to go to work so I can pay for my agility addiction - and being a high school teacher right now is intense - National testing is
    coming up very shortly for my Grade 9s and of course the Education department and the Union are clashing heads over it - Union says teachers won't be a part of it whereas my Principal has different ideas and then there's the teachers and kids stuck in the middle.
    It's ridiculous!

    I am going to have mainline and marathon my Smallville episodes so I can catch up - I'm missing you Smallville! And I have the distinct feeling due to not having any free weekends for the next month I may not get to watch Supernatural as it airs too (well as much as you can when you live in Australia and pray at the altar of channel Bit Torrent ;-)...) I need a fairy godmother...or a dragon. I'm sure that will solve all my time (or lack thereof) issues.

    

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  • 04/22/10--08:33: Article 17
  • Two posts in as many days - there's something screwy going on here. Couldn't help myself really - I keep going through [info]elsiecat 's Rome SPN Con photos and I had to have a play with some of the Jared shots.




     




     
    HANDS!







    SCRUNCHY NOSE GRIN!






     
    EARNESTNESS!






     
    TONGUE!
     



    BACKLIT HANDS!

     
     
     

    Many thanks to [info]elsiecat  and her wonderful con photography. You can see all the originals for these and many many more wonderful shots at her lj.

    In conclusion I am forced to acknowledge that there are signs that I may just have a teeny tiny crush on Jared Padalecki. But it's a teeny one - like this big  *pinches thumb and forefinger together*. Oh yes. You're all shocked - I can tell.

    

     


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    It's been three days now since the end of the 2010 Australian Agility Nationals held here in Perth this year.

     

    And I'm still in a funk...I got up Monday morning to go back to work after taking most of the previous week off in order to compete and was beset with this feeling of BLAH. I so wanted to go back to the showgrounds and do it all over again!

    I have never had so much fun with four days of my favourite sport EVER! Perth saw over 180 handlers arrive from every state in Australia (including Tasmania and the Northern Territory) and nearly 300 dogs of all shapes, breeds, cross breeds and sizes. Nearly 3000 runs were completed by the end of the four day event.

    I was running with three dogs this year - my young girl Spryte (3 years old), my boy Cypher (5 years old) and my borrowed playmate Mr Axl (The Koolie who is just three). Over the course of the four days I ran 46 different courses and competed in three different finals.

    The upshoot of it all was my little girl Spryte - made three finals - she came second in two of them. One of them we came second by 0.08 of a second (it's that accurate because we have laser electronic timing gates). I'd love to do it all again but now we have to wait another two years - June 2012 - in Sydney.

    Highlights of the weekend was the event being so well organised I was able to watch so many of my fellow competitor runs - seeing dogs from all over the country compete was a real treat. And here I give the photographic highlights.

    Spryte - finishing her run in the Masters Jumping final - she knocked the first bar down
    but finished in style.






    Spryte in the Open Jumping Final - now I just wonder where could we have shaved 0.08 of a second on our time!


    My friend's dog - Terra who won two finals - an awesome dog to run, such an adrenaline rush!


    A bearded collie - aka A Beardie known as Sonic. All the way from Queensland he was magnificent to watch!


    Snazzy - a blue merle Border Collie who is doing his best to hug those weave poles tight.


    Merlot - A big chocolate and white Border Collie telling his handler how he really feels!


    Jezabel - the Smithfield, from Canberra she was a delightfully happy dog to watch - always had a smile on her face.


    Once all the gear is packed away - puppy Neala is allowed out to play with her big sister Kwyk.
     


    I managed to finish off three masters titles - one with Spryte and two with Axl - and over the whole weekend qualified in around 15 runs. The courses were great, the judges very nice and the socialising with friends from all over the country fantastic. I talked nothing but dogs and agility for four whole days and never got tired of it. Admittedly by the finals day I was feeling my energy levels drop but a can of Red Bull fixed all that straight away. Mr Redteekal spent four days taking photos ringside and is currently busy fulfilling everyone's orders.

    The event has inspired me to work even harder towards the next one - there's no such thing as too much training or conditioning or learning when it comes to this sport and I hope to have young Savvy (a Spryte daughter) competing by then - who knows - maybe she'll even make the Masters class by then? We can but try. So now it's back to reality and daydreaming about how I could make this sport my well paying job!

    

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  • 05/07/10--05:09: 5.21
  • So in short:

    Was it only my random thought when I saw the side profile of DEATH (after drooling over his sweet ride mind you) that Wouldn't it be cool if DEATH was Marilyn Manson? Anyone? Bueller? It was just me wasn't it? *sigh* I mean I have no idea if the dude can even act but he would certainly look the part.

    Secondly when we first see DEATH - all slo mo'ed with the O Death song in the background (totally freaking awesome btw) - at that moment 7 month old Border Collie puppy curled on my lap glanced at the screen and was totally entranced followed by very quickly utterly freaked out when DEATH started being the main focus. She left the room the poor girl - Savvy doesn't like DEATH at all. I knew there was a reason I called her Savvy. She now glances suspiciously at TV whenever she comes in the room now. I shall have to put Inspector Rex on. She likes him.

    Thirdly - Chicago is totally on my list now. For the deep dish pizza alone. I had no idea there was pizza out there that looks like freakin' PIE people. That is awesome.

    Lastly - I predict Sam will jump into the pit but because he is SAM FREAKIN' WINCHESTER he will pop right back out again merely smouldering slightly and patting out tiny flames. And my answer to DEATH's You can't cheat DEATH Dean - Ahhh exactly how many times have the Winchesters died now Mr DEATH? Yeah. That's what I'm talking about. *looks smug enough to cover the slight quivering of my heart about next week's episode*


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  • 05/16/10--08:44: 5.22 Instant Thoughts
  •  

    First off – I have never felt so relieved to hear Chuck’s voice in my life. His interludes into the history and the significance of the Impala were sweet blessed relief to the constant sense of impending doom and the stress of watching the finale. Those little vignettes on the Impala were when I felt like I could breathe. I am beginning to think that when I am experiencing such physical symptoms (thudding heart, feeling of tightness in the chest and the beginnings of an almighty emotional overload stress head ache) that perhaps some TV show has maybe got its claws into one just a little more deep than is healthy. That finale made my face hurt. ..I think I would be in bed with all the curtains drawn and a veritable plethora of headache meds swallowed if it weren’t for those brief (and utterly light hearted in comparison) forays into Impala back story.

    In a way I’m glad I’m a part of the fandom – because there were moments in this episode where I could detach from all the stress and angst and just think about all the fangirls  (and fanboys no doubt) out there and what their instant reaction to certain events might have been. This was the perfect distraction for me from my own emotional distress. When Lucifer exploded Cas all I thought was Fuck! the Misha/Cas girls are gonna break the internets with the rioting and then when Bobby was killed I was Jesus Christ I hope Kripke has good personal security.

    I think the hardest part for me to bear was the Lucifer laying into Dean part.  What Dean was saying was absolutely slaying me with the pain. Here the guy is being beaten bloody, his face one huge haematoma of mashed pulp and he’s letting Sam know he’s always gonna be with him. Whoever wrote that scene is a psychological manipulator of the most deviant kind. The kind that probably writes ads for health insurance using personal stories of cancer. Yeah - that kind of evil.  I was sucha puddle of relieved goo when Cas came back and fixed him. Looking at Jensen’s face like that really made me wince and cringe on his behalf.

    As an aside I was so impressed with Jared’s acting in this. It was such a heavy episode for him and there was not a single teeny tiny millisecond of any of his scenes where I felt he’d missed it. There was so much to laud in this. Some perfect line deliveries that I’m gonna have to rewatch and enjoy again.  Friggin’ awesome.  I hope he got a lot of personal and professional satisfaction out of watching the job he did.

    I loved how this episode did not, for one beat, let up with the intensity of the sense of series finale. Not season finale but series. From go to woah it was all about the last five years and the story of Sam and Dean.  The feeling of this is the end was so well constructed that even though I knew there is a Season 6 it felt like a five year long story had ended. Chuck was right – endings are the biggest pain in the ass there is in terms of story writing and for all the reasons he gave to us. At a number of moments within Chuck’s scenes I sat there and thought with a wry smile that Chuck is totally Eric Kripke talking to those fans who’ve watched every single episode of this show.

    I did predict in my last post here in my journal that Sam would pop straight back up out of the cage – and he did! Sans the smouldering of course and possibly Himself had a fair bit to do with this but it really was because it was Sam FUCKING Winchester folks and that boy is special. Himself doesn’t intervene for just any hero who saves the world. He does for Sam FUCKING Winchester though.

    I did seriously spend the last five minutes of this episode having minor heart palpitations that the whole thing was going to end on a cliff hanger. Once again Eric never does things the easy way or the less traumatic way. Somehow Eric has a cliff hanger without having a cliff hanger. I’m not sure that there will ever be another show that manages the balance of keeping your average viewer happy and your hardcore fans just as enthralled (and yes ‘enraged at times’ also works here). This episode ended with just enough loose threads to keep your usual run of the mill type viewers (ie viewers who haven’t watched every single episode obsessively multiple times over) interested in tuning in next season. The only rope I wanna know about is how many episodes till they fix the boys and give us back Sam and Dean. I guess I’m not really taking the whole Lisa/Apple pie life thing seriously. I like the attempt at trying to get me all angst ridden over the boys being apart but I’ve been there done that and got the t shirt that says “Sam and Dean can last less than two whole episodes apart EVER”. And I’m fine with all that.  When I say I like the attempt I like it because it’s a simple attempt – it doesn’t leave me wringing my hands concerned for the boys.  Maybe Kripke thinks he’s done that to us enough this season and is cutting us a break.  I’d be surprised at any of fandom buying the Lisa/Apple pie distraction as a serious attempt to split the boys up. I’m purely speculating here (as I haven’t waded through my 380 skip flist yet) but I can imagine there might be some offended souls out there who are a little insulted by the simplicity of it all. As if we’d buy it. I have an affinity to the ostrich in this respect – the fact that it is so flimsy and clearly lacking in substance makes it perfectly easy to dismiss. I admit I am looking forward to the reunion once Dean spirals into self destruct without his Sammy though. This is all Eric's influence talking now.

    I’m really fascinated by the Impala story in all this though. For so long it has been such a huge symbol in Sam and Dean’s lives that it has always felt like that it should be treated with the same sort of significance as any Winchester family member. I loved the way Chuck wrote about it and can’t wait to listen and watch all that over again. I can feel that more consideration of the Impala’s role in Sam gaining hold over Lucifer is going to be happening soon. Any kind of glimpses into the boys’ childhoods and growing up just make me flail in delight especially when I consider all the fodder for my favourite writers in the fandom. *Does the Snoopy happy dance*

    This was a fitting and so very satisfying finale for me, I could probably be accused of lacking critical thought on the clearly OOC behaviour of Dean at the end but to me it’s just not important enough. There was too much to squee about to allow that to intrude on all the happy heart-warming gratitude I felt for the show. A letter for Eric:

    Dear Eric

    Thankyou for:

    1)      Not leaving Sammy in the pit

    2)      For not leaving Bobby with his neck snapped and dead

    3)      For not leaving Castiel exploded

    4)      For not making Dean kill Sam

    5)      For not letting Lucifer kill Dean

    6)      Getting Chuck to tell us The Story of Sam and Dean and The Impala

    Best of luck for your future endeavours, may they all revolve around Supernatural forever.

    Love Me

    

     


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  • 05/21/10--04:56: Question for the FLIST
  • Okay flisties I have a question. I have the opportunity to fly to Texas at the end of June to attend a 6 day conference for work related professional development, just outside of Houston. Two colleagues are already going and they're making it a three week trip to Texas, San Francisco, New Orleans and one other city. So this would be the month of July. It's at my expense (which I can claim back at tax time). I'm thinking this could be a recon mini trip as precursor to the big 4 to 5 month one I've got planned for 2011/12.

    Should I just bite the bullet and go?

    Are those places great in July?

    What's the weather like?

    Okay that was three questions. I get carried away sometimes.

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  • 05/26/10--05:51: Glee
  • Anybody on my flist watch Glee? I feel the need to gesticulate....and think critically. Spoilers for the latest episode.



    Mr Redteekal and I actually stopped the episode to have a discussion after the scene between Kurt, Finn and Kurt's Dad. The one in the boys' shared room.

    I was awkwardly cheering on Kurt's Dad as he made his speech but I say awkwardly because I felt there was some sort of double standard shenanigans going on here. I totally understood Finn's POV. Kurt is domineering and imposing and interfering and totally projecting his wants and desires onto Finn in a very uncool way.

    We discussed if the roles were reversed and if Kurt had to move in with Finn it would be the equivalent of Finn leaving skin mags lying round, wallpapering his wall with scantily clad women, or his football heroes and putting gym equipment in there as appropriate furnishings and painting the walls in primary blue or something similar. Finn had a valid argument - he should not be made to feel uncomfortable in his own room simply because he is different to Kurt. How he expressed that to Finn was quite inadequate and inconsiderate but I can see where his frustrations originate from.

    I am all for Kurt being who he wants to be regardless of how different that makes him or how much he stands out because of it. I am not for Kurt assuming that because Finn does Glee club that he wants to be noticed in the same way or assuming that he can change Finn into who he wants him to be.  Finn is okay with Kurt being who he is - it's a non-issue for him. He's a bit like a baffled puppy about it and he can't understand it but he's generally okay with it. He's not okay with feeling awkward in his own space. Finn is a dumb schmuck at times and really not a great match for Kurt on any level even if he did swing that way but he doesn't deserve to be accused of intolerance. He does deserve a smack upside the head for resorting to the tired old offensive insults to express himself. And Kurt needs to back off and acknowledge how he is trying to change Finn and how that's so not right.

    I wanted to use this episode in school for my 9th graders - the lack of tolerance in the high school I teach at is at times appalingly overwhelming and it feels like a mammoth and impossible undertaking to try and even slow down that wave most of the time. The speech the Dad gave was just a perfect articulation of the state of the situation in general with regards to tolerance. But I know my more critical thinking kids will be able to justify Finn's stance and his subsequent poorly expressed reaction with clear evidence. It's a complex issue when it comes to tolerance of difference and sexualities, religion and appearance. Kurt is clearly gay (although I did like Sue's line about the showtunes in a previous episode - that was food for thought) and he is quite rightly unashamed and open about his proclivities however he does nothing but fuel the fires of intolerance when he chooses to try and change the way someone is or project his desires onto someone who is clearly different from himself and not gay. Sometimes the targets of intolerance are their own worst enemies. So I'm not sure now if this would really go down so well as a prime example of what tolerance means. Thoughts? Comments? Screaming objections?

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    It's my birthday today and I feel the need to share the LOVE.

    TEN THINGS WOT MAKE ME 'APPY RIGHT NOW.

    1. Today :) Started with a lie in and some snuggling ;) Moved to lazy getting out of bed for pressies and then onto playing with the puppies at agility, followed by cake with friends, moving onto a lovely evening meal at a great restaurant in Fremantle followed up by a thoroughly entertaining comedic action packed flick - The Losers.

    2. Planning my three week holiday - first EVER to the USA at the end of June - hitting San Francisco, New Orleans, Houston, San Diego and LA. So much to see and do I'm a little delerious with all the choices I am beseiged by! Should we do Wicked in SF? San Diego Zoo? Paddle steamers in New Orleans? Alcatraz? Houston - what do we do with our evenings in Houston? A baseball game? I'm looking for the quintessential American experiences all unique to those cities.

    3. Long weekend coming up next weeked.

    4. Supernatural small fan meet up in Perth at a private cinema which we're hiring and then playing Sam and Dean on THE BIG SCREEN. This shall suffice till Kripke pulls his finger out and gets a movie deal happening. Food, drinks, good friends and Supernatural movie sized. What more could I want?

    5. My puppies :) They're going great guns in training and trialling and I love spending my time being with them doing something we both love so much. Little Miss Spryte is on her way now to her Agility Champion title. Miss Savvy has just turned 8 months and is like a little jumping bean the energy she has makes me envious. Mr Cypher is having fun with his less intensive training schedule and loves his fun runs out.

    6. BOOKS - OMG so many great books on the go right now it's not funny. Going Bovine by Libba Bray is an absolute blast and so well written. George Monbiot's Bring on the Apocalypse. Of course I have my Rough Guide and my Lonely Planet to the USA always open right now.

    7. TV Shows - On the go still right now is Big Bang Theory, Criminal Minds, House, Glee, CSI and NCIS, started watching Psych - so far it's mildly good - will stick it out a bit longer, got SV to catch up on and am eagerly awaiting the start of Dexter and True Blood. Still rewatching Spn A LOT. May give Bones a try. Want to see Leverage and 30 Rock.

    8. Ugg Boots - people there is no excuse for cold feet when these miraculous, marvellous inventions are available to you. I LOVE my ugg boots in winter. No need for socks - just THE UGG.

    9. Getting my kids into reading - we're doing Tomorrow When The War Began right now, by John Marsden with all of my 9th graders and the kids are so keen to keep on reading (seven books in the series) and many of them have been impressed by the trailer for the movie coming out soon. I love reading to them and I love it when they get inspired to read more because of it.

    10. My Flist and fandom and all the friends I get to talk to via lj, private messaging, twitter and facebook. The internet blows my mind EVERY day (both in the good and the bad ways) and I just love reading, watching, listening to all the posts that head my way via my flist. You guys ROCK and so often I feel very inadequate when it comes to fandom but I figure so long as I let you guys know what I think of a post or a fanfic or a vid or a music, tv, movie rec and post here when moved with the urge to do so then I am indeed partaking in fandom.

    YAY BIRTHDAYS ROCK!!

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    When faced with tough life-changing, career-forming, general moral compass like decisions in every day life it's nice to step
    into the world of Twitter and know that this is the most challenging question you will confront:
    VIA TWITTER:theawfultruth  Which True Blood Dude Is Hotter Naked? http://bit.ly/bhnOdj This link poses the question and follows it up with pictorial research.

    I've made my choice and cast my vote. Photographic evidence supported by decision. What say you flist?

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  • 06/03/10--16:35: Important Announcement
  • I am watching Jared Padalecki and Jensen Ackles on the BIG SCREEN tonight. Sam and Dean ladies and gents - on A BIG SCREEN - we're talking CINEMA sized folks.

    What Hellatus indeed.

    In other news my first ever visit to the US of A is in 16 days. Any secret travel tips for the US of A out there?
    Itinerary:
    San Francisco
    Houston - Teaching Conference
    San Francisco
    New Orleans
    Houston - Teaching Conference
    San Diego
    Los Angeles
    Home.

    That all might seem cool, calm and composed right there but really I'm all like WHEEEEEE!!!!!! \o/\o/\o/\o/\o/

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  • 06/25/10--08:35: Wheeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!
  • Ok last post for at least a day maybe two because I am OFF! And not in the "phwoar you're a bit ripe" way either. I am off on a jet plane in about five hours...sadly I know when I'll be back again (actually not sadly because I shall miss Mr Redteekal and the puppies muchly - but sadly because I shall not be defecting to Canada and living my life long dream of running a dog sled team in the Iditarod...boo hoo...there's always next year!) In the meantime it's Hi ho Hi ho it's off to Texas I go!

    However it is World Cup time and whilst to many of you it's probably no more than a blip on the sporting calendar radar I have become embroiled in the intensity, the hilarity, the dramatic performances and a significant amount of amusement (was it true the French coach consulted his astrological charts before deciding who took the field? Because that would be good.  that is the epic international world cup stage.

    So here have a funny youtube ad about the Germany V England game on Sunday...it's safe, born and bred Deutschlander Mr Redteekal had a good laugh. Ahh Europeans....endlessly amusing in their self deprecating ways.


    Toodoo- loo!!

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    I haz ARRIVED!! 20 hours of flying, 6 hours of stop overs, four timezones, one live screening of the good fight the US soccer team gave, and an endless number of baggage checks later I am sitting at the Hilton posting this. :-) I heart technology.

    My Top FOUR Initial Impressions - should be five but I blame jetlag ;P

    1. Americans seem to have an impressively high tolerance for long queues for just about everything! (Or is it resignation?) Either way I am impressed. Gazillions of people lining up to go through federal inspection at customs (even residents) and total of four counters out of fifty working. Yet no dramas. Apart from my slightly panicked internal voice wondering if I'd make my connection. I did. I didn't miss one flight the entire trip. That's always good.

    2. My word you are a friendly bunch of people! I think no less than five conversations started up in various lines, on various planes just friendly chit chat. Talking to a compete stranger. That was so kind of refreshing. I don't think it's so open back home, I mean we're friendly enough but I think we're just more apathetic maybe about that kind of thing. You guys have a social zest :)

    3. Why is it every country I go to outside of Australia just seems to affirm more and more for me that Australians just haven't got a clue when it comes to driving? At least here in Texas you know how to drive. And the cab driver was fantastic - fast, smooth, efficient, no engaging in the banalities of chit chat unless I instigated it. Awesome. We're just so tentative, a total nanny like state when it comes to driving - here it's 60 or 70 mph all the way and no slowing down to change lanes.

    4. The air con - so good it could be the Arctic! I swear I had to wear double layers once I got in my room - thermostat set for like 15 degrees...I fixed it to 20 but still need to grab a jacket every time the AC kicks on.

    Right-oh. Off to a shower and then to explore!

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    Just to put that random subject line into perspective for y'all, in Australia, just after you get your driver's license you have to place up in the front and back windows these white plates with a big red P on them to indicate that A. You're a probationary driver and B. You've got your license for the first time. I think the analogy is appropriate.

    So Dorothy has left Texas and entered San Francisco via Phoenix, Arizona. In Phoenix I think the airlines conduct their own scientific experiments by trying to see if they can cook their passengers in that narrow walk way pressure cooker from the plane to the airport. Honestly I felt like I was being broiled alive there. So that gave me a good inkling of Phoenix weather in July. *Makes note - save Arizona for December*

    So before I left Texas the foods I had tried included Cajun catfish, etoufee, gumbo and dirty rice, Mexican - omnomnom, refried beans, flour tortillas, nachos with some kind of mixed melted cheese sauce that mixed so well with the salsa I thought my tastebuds had died and gone to heaven. We tried the Texan version of Greek and Italian and on my last day I had Texan BBQ. I always knew the BBQ sauces in Australia were sadly lacking - smoked beef brisket, BBQ sauce, potato salad and coleslaw all deliciously good but the highlight? and I cannot get over the generosity by the way...the highlight was my new found Texan friends had made a stop at Blue Bell ice cream (after I mentioned that high quality ice cream was few and far between in Perth) and brought some individual tubs for us all to have. I now want to import Blue Bell into Perth. They tell me the ice cream is the best because their cows are happiest *vbg*.

    As if that wasn't enough kindness - two of my new found friends decided that I wouldn't be allowed to pay a nearly $50 cab fare back to Hobby airport. They DROVE me there. I am seriously just staggered by how kind, friendly and generous the Texan people have been.  They not only drove me there, they drove me there in completely horrendous road conditions as Texas caught the stormy aftermath of Hurricane Alex. They were all so fantastic and I am definitely going back to Texas.

    It made me realise that we don't have that in Australia and you know I think it's circumstances - these people faced Ike, there was 9/11, there was Katrina, there's the fact that they share sons and daughters off in Iraq - I think all these things plus the underlying spirit of Southern hospitality have just combined to make for a communal feeling of such friendship, camaraderie and empathy towards each other. Less than two days after being on this workshop for school I felt like I could have known these people all my life - that's how comfortable and welcome they made me. I have never attended any kind of workshop in Australia where that would happen - like I said to my new found friends Australians are very much - if it's too good, it's too good to be true. It's sad but if this kind of open arm friendliness was displayed I think Australians would be a little wary. I'm not sure how that can change - as it is a cultural thing, it definitely relates to the groundswell of feeling about the lack of community in our country. I really think it's a grass roots issue that gets fixed by the individual making those choices.

    And now I am here in San Francisco! Only for a few days and then we're off to New Orleans. I've been told the Sourdough on the Wharf is a must eat item and we're doing Alcatraz this afternoon. On that note - Breakfast!

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  • 07/10/10--15:42: N'awlins - Who Dat?
  • Okay who wants to go shares in a house down here in the New Orleans Garden district?? This place is astounding and I think I need to spend at least another two weeks here to appreciate it all.

    What a chequered past this New Orleans has had, full of a vibrant, sordid, triumphant, tragic, intriguing and  eclectic history I am not surprised that this is the birth place of jazz. The French Quarter is just amazing - you can spend hours just dawdling round these streets marvelling at the architecture, the sights and the smells (not all of them pleasantly interesting). On the three hour tour we did which took in many different places including the Garden district, the St Louis Cemetery No 3, the Warehouse and Arts district, the "American Sector" we also saw the Lower Ninth Ward and the work that is being done with Brad Pitt's financial backing to replace lost homes. There's some scepticism with our tour guides about the whole Katrina aftermath, the flood walls breaking and how there is much misinformation out there about how the flooding came to be - their levees held, the Army engineering flood walls didn't. Few of them feel that New Orleans will never reach the same status it had pre Katrina simply because of the numbers of relocation and how so many just haven't returned because of lack of work.

    Following Miss [info]lillaw 's advice we did Antoinne's Restaurant last night and what a fantastic place that is. Our waiter was an extremely genteel, softly spoken Louisiana native who gave us superb service and an excellent guided tour of all the dining rooms and what a place this restaurant turned out to be! Not to mention the food! We had the shrimp, the crab remoulade, I had the Chicken Rochambert and the three of us (and thank the lord there were three of us) shared the famed Baked Alaska for dessert. Holy cow that thing was huge and delicious and as soon as I've downloaded a decent photo editing program Imma gonna be posting the photos to y'all. *vbg*

    We also did the Natchez paddleboat steamer dinner cruise up and down the great Mississippi and that was so pleasant I didn't want to get off. We were the last passengers off the boat - the weather here is soooo beautiful at night balmy and warm with a slight breeze that you can stay out on the water all night. The catfish was good and their frozen margaritas extremely smooth going down. Mmmmmm. I never really knew I'd like these sorts of drinks till I tried them here and boy are they good.

    We've done the famous Cafe Du Monde and tried their beignets and yes indeed - don't wear dark colours whilst eating. That place must go through several truckloads of icing sugar a day. Those french donuts are absolutely yummy and go excellently well with cold chocolate milk....since I don't drink the coffee ;-)

    The heat I have to say is a little stifling - I am not a fan of the sweating buckets brigade whilst standing still even! Cold showers in the hotel have been divine and the air conditioning is no luxury round here. I'm a cold weather person who is accustomed to the Aussie heat waves but the humidity alone is ten times worse than Houston. It's not surprising Bourbon street does so well - taking in more liquids has never been so much fun or cheap although I'm pretty sure alcohol has the opposite effect of re-hydrating a body! I do have to mention the New Orleans tribute to the customary Spanish event - the running of the bulls (I can't stand seeing that tradition happen on TV in Spain) however I like the way they do it here. Their 'bull' is a largish guy sitting on a broomstick wooden pony, wearing a bull's head on ROLLERBLADES. Dressed from head to toe in red and white. It's awesome and completely bull-cruelty free, I LIKES IT. Spain take note. By the way I'm backing the Netherlands tomorrow.

    We're off to the Red Fish Grill restaurant tonight and then flying into Houston tomorrow - where we'll catch a shuttle to League City.
    The people here have been friendly and helpful and interesting to talk to. I'm definitely coming back here. :)

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